So… I told myself I would never blog, and I also told myself I would never write about motherhood. Don't we hear enough about it? Aren't there enough voices? Perspectives? Feelings? Opinions? Judgements? Observations? Experiences? But then time and time again, people have reached out to me about business because I'm a mother. Since I have so many thoughts and feelings on the topic, I thought maybe I should just start writing them out already.
Having said that, here are some of the phases I've gone through to get to this point:
-I don't need to do it.
-Eeeeek—I don't want to post pictures or thoughts about my kids online!
-Maybe I'll regret it later.
-Maybe my kids will read it later and be upset?
-Talking about motherhood is boring.
-It’s divisive/too touchy.
-I don't want to to associated with “mom talk.”
-It's too vulnerable.
-Isn't working and having childcare the whole point of getting away and being able to not talk about kids?
-It's too hard to fully express myself.
-What if someone judges me?
-What if I write something, then someone points out that I wasn’t sensitive enough? I’ll feel horrible and shamed.
-And on and on and on...
But I keep coming back to it. It's like something that's visiting me that I'm obligated to write about. Like the “little creative genius” that Elizabeth Gilbert talks about in her famous Ted Talk and in Big Magic.
So, in the future when I talk about motherhood, I will always point to this disclaimer post. Is it fair to have a disclaimer post? I dunno, maybe not.
Maybe I should take full responsibility — but here are all of my disclaimers, anyway:
-These are all MY opinions.
-I don’t have my shit together. (I promise.)
-If I hurt your feelings, I’m seriously already so, so, SO sorry.
-If I said something insensitive, I’m also sorry.
-I’m trying my best, and I think you are too.
-If I say something terrible, please email me. I would love to chat with you about it - you can even book me for a call. Here’s my personal calendar.
It’s funny writing this post as if I have millions of people visiting my late-to-the-game-2017-blog, but I realized that I’ve been paralyzed talking about this subject even though I do, in fact, care very much about it. For the reasons above and because (I promise this is the last list):
-I see so many women hurting.
-Sometimes when I read about this topic, there’s something a bit off - like how Lean In talks more to a traditional corporate realm, and other voices just feel too stiff or sometimes too raw even?
-Entrepreneurship can be lonely, and motherhood can be super lonely. The combination can make for a big mess.
-I love my babes — and, really — sometimes I love my kids more than I want to think/feel because it can consume me.
-I have felt this strange shift in my life where I’m able to be less judgmental, and look at all the women in my life as if I would be sitting down with them one on one and I have more compassion, understanding and with that comes more thoughts and feelings towards them and about their struggles with motherhood
-I think there’s a “mom-feminist” shift happening (we’re not quite there yet) that’s less about being a “girl boss” or straight up “leaning in” and more about doing whatever the f*** you want. Whether you’re rocking the stay-at-home mom world and sewing your own jumpsuits, going into a traditional 9-5 job, transforming your hobby into a business, or an actual mix of all three, YOU. DO. YOU.
-All of my clients have untraditional work situations - which makes me think if they’re untraditional, it’s probably the new traditional. Shouldn’t we just embrace this new norm? Soon enough, my friends.
-I want women/moms/female forms everywhere to empower themselves and to OWN IT.
So now, with all my reasons literally listed out, I can post about about motherhood...right? Right.
I’ll see you in the future with all of the crazy offensive things I have to say about business and motherhood. Let’s do this.